Nahrbtniki, prijatelji in strije.

Last week I went shopping with my sister and then I realized I haven’t bought a purse in a while. When you’re a busy mom of a toddler who loves to be carried you simply don’t have a free hand to carry a purse. So I switched to backpacks. And that made me think about all the things that have changed since I became a mom.

As you know I was only seventeen when I got pregnant, so you can only imagine the dramatic changes in my life going from a reckless teenager to a mom in only a few months.

The fist thing I noticed was how my circle of friends diminished. Some left because they simply didn’t understand my wish to become a mom at such a young age and some I left behind as I couldn’t relate to them or their problems anymore.

When you become a mom your priorities change completely. Before I got pregnant my priorities were partying, spending time with my friends and Simon and binge watching my favorite series. My first priority now is always Johan. I always have to make sure he is clean, fed and happy. The second priority is Simon (and making sure he is fed and happy too :’D). Other priorities are school, blogging and spending quality time with my friends and family. I do not party anymore, I only see my friends a few times a month and I became so much more focused on school.

But one of the most important things is my changed view on my body. Even though I was way skinnier before having a baby, I had zero stretchmarks and my boobs were way perkier, I always found something to dislike about my body. I used to be bothered by my small hips or boobs or my belly lacking abs. I would either feel too fat or too skinny. I can’t say that I love everything about my body now or that my insecurities vanished over night, but I view those imperfections from a different angle. I have stretchmarks because gave life to a gorgeous little boy, my boobs aren’t as perky as before, because I breastfeed him, I have belly rolls because…  because every single girl has them when they sit down.

I realized that every single part of the human body has a function. And that it’s surely not the function to fit the current beauty standards. Your skin is there to protect your body, your fat is there to protect your organs and to keep you warm, your boobs are there a (also!) to feed a child and your ass is there to sit on it. And as long as you are healthy you should know that there is absolutely nothing wrong with your body and it is perfect just the way it is. With or without stretchmarks and cellulite.

Of course I could go on for days telling you all the things that have changed. For example, always having company while on the toilet, waking up in the middle of the night, forgetting about free time and so on… But today I just wanted to highlight the most important ones.

As always, thank you for reading.

With love,

Melita Ivana xx.

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Prejšnji teden sva se s sestro odpravili po nakupih in medtem, ko sem si ogledovala nove kolekcije torbic sem se zavedla da si že dolgo nisem nobene kupila, saj nosim samo še nahrbtnike. Mamice malčkov ponavadi pač nimamo prostih rok, da bi nosile še torbico. Začela sem razmišljati o vseh stvareh, ki so se spremenile odkar sem postala mamica.

Kot veste, sem zanosila pri sedemnajstih letih in lahko si samo predstavljate, kako zelo se je moje življenje spremenilo, ko sem morala tako na hitro odrasti.

Najprej sem opazila, da se je zelo zmanjšal moj krog prijateljev. Nekateri so odšli, ker niso razumeli, da si pri sedemnajstih želim postati mamica, nekatere pa sem pustila za sabo, ker se preprosto nisem mogla več poistovetiti z njimi in njihovimi težavami.

Ko postaneš mamica, se tvoje prioritete popolnoma spremenijo. Preden sem zanosila, sem najraje žurala s prijateljicami, preživljala čas s Simonom ali pa sem ure in ure gledala svoje najljubše serije. Sedaj je moja glavna prioriteta vedno Johan. Poskreti moram, da je čist, sit in zadovoljen. Za tem pride na vrsto Simon (tudi njega moram nahraniti in poskrbeti, da je zadovoljen :’D), šola, blog in čas s prijateljicami in družino. Alkohola ne pijem več, svoje prijateljice vidim le nekajkrat na mesec in veliko več časa namenim šoli.

Ena izmed največjih sprememb, pa je to, kako dojemam svoje telo. Čeprav sem bila pred nosečnostjo veliko bolj suha, nisem imela strij, moje prsi pa niso bile niti malo povešene, sem vseeno vedno našla kakšno napako. Včasih so se mi zdele moje prsi premajhne, boki preozki, včasih se mi je zdelo da moj trebuh ni dovolj mišičast, ali sem se zdela sama sebi debela, drugič pa spet presuha. Seveda ne morem trditi, da sedaj obožujem prav vsak del svojega telesa in da je moja nesamozavest čez noč izpuhtela, vendar sedaj vse moje nepravilnosti vidim v popolnoma drugačni luči. Strije imam, ker sem rodila čudovitega malega fantka, moje prsi so malo povešene, ker dojim in vem, da imam na trebuhu “šlaufke”, kadar se vsedem, ker… ker jih ima pač vsaka punca, ne glede na to kako je suha.

Dojela sem pač, da ima čisto vsak del telesa svojo funkcijo in ta nikoli ni ustrezanje trenutnim lepotnim idealom, ki nam jih narekuje družba. Kožo imamo, da brani telo pred zunanjimi vplivi, špehek je tam zato, da ščiti tvoje organe, joške imamo (tudi!) za hranjenje otroka, rit pa zato, da se nanjo vsedemo. Dokler si zdrava se vedno zavedaj, da ni s tvojim telesom čisto nič narobe in da je popolno prav takšno, kakršno je. Strije in celulit gol ali dol.

Sprememb je še veliko, kot naprimer to, da nisem nikoli več sama, ko lulam, da se vsako noč zbujam, da sem pozabila kaj pomeni “prosti čas” in tako naprej… Ampak danes sem raje ostala pri tistih najpomembnejših.

Kot vedno, hvala za branje.

Poljupčki,

Melita Ivana xx.

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